Other stuff:

Stuff people have heard me say:

• If you find yourself at the bottom of a hole, stop digging.
• Weird people have more fun.
• If you find yourself drowning, call for help.
• Pass the doritos.
• Why do bad things happen to good people?!

Hobbies, etc.:

• Playing my euphonium.
• Singing.
• Playing volleyball.
• Playing golf.
• Computer games (Bloons TD6, Hexapolis, Candy Crush, Civ IV, V, VI, Age of Mythology, Factorio, Baba is You, Stardew Valley).
• Programming.

Funny but true quotes:

Any code of yours that you haven't looked at for six months or more might as well have been written by someone else. - Alan Eagleson.

For a long time, it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless. And then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are in short, a perfect match. - Bill Bryson.

Sometimes, it pays to stay in bed on Monday rather than spend the rest of the week debugging Monday's code. - Christopher Thompson.

No matter how sleek the demo is in rehearsal, when you do it in front of the live audience, the probability of a flawless presentation is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the amount of money involved. - Mark Gibbs.

A computer once beat me at chess but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning. - Rick Cock.

There's a story about a person who wished his computer was as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone. - Bjarne Stroustrup.

In my egoistic opinion, most peoples' programs should be indented six feet downwards and covered with dirt. - Blair Houghton.

There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. - C.A.R. Hoare.

Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, I'll use regular expressions." Now they have two problems. - Jamie Zawinski.